A man was driving home from work with his girlfriend. They were in the middle of a huge fight about something stupid again, and he was pretty sure she was about to break up with him. He turned a corner and yelled, “Shit!” as he slammed the right front end of his car into a light post, shattering the passenger side headlight.

“Oh my god…what just happened?” The girl yelled in a shaky voice.

“Shit. Did you see that puppy that just ran in front of me? I almost hit it,” the man said shouted.

“Oh my god, no. I didn’t see it. Is he okay?”

“I didn’t hit him...he should be fine,“ he said. “Poor little dog, I don’t know what I would have done if I’d hit him. Thank god I missed. Are you okay, honey?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” she said. She gave him a big hug and said, “I love you.”

They drove home and had awesome sex.

There was no dog.